hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
I literally just saw a campus policeman riding a Segway pull over a moving car. you should just give up.
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
I sat alone in Buffalo Wild Wings eating chocolate cake on Country Western karoake night. The waiter asked me if I was ok. Twice.
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
He hasn't touched a vagina in two and a half years. THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE TO BE UNDER
Okay. So I've done lines off a bible. But that's just for the sake of being cliché.
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
Text me some of your sweat
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