i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
Our relationship is like that beach boys song "help me Rhonda" and I'm fucking Rhonda. And Rhondas's the whore in case you've never heard it.
i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
this is getting really bad. i thought the chandelier in the dining room was one of those claws from the claw games in an arcade and i spent the past five minutes jumping left to right so the claw wouldn't grab me
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
Randomize