you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
There is a pile of hair outside the apartment next door. At least now I know what all that shouting was about last night.
I hate it when fuck holes buy me drinks at the bar. You don't know my order. You don't know me. You don't know where I've been. You don't know my life.
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
You would be successful and sober without me. you can't turn your bakon me now
Irony: drinking your pre workout supplement out of the cup your Krispy Kreme doughnut holes came in.
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
Randomize
