I set the bag of cheetos on the open box on my coffee table while I was watching TV. I was so high I ate half of the styrofoam peanuts in the box by accident. Am I going to die?
I hope so
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
Nothing quite like coming out of an alcohol induced blackout walking down Spruill Avenue carrying a silver briefcase full of IT tools you don't know where they came from. This is my life.
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
You were passed out by the toliet and when i said i had to pee you told me to piss in the sink. Never has a girl with alcohol poisoning been so rude.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
I was not drunk. There was Star Wars, sex, and baby oil.
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
Randomize