I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
Ask me how many people I've slept with. Because its changed since I last saw you.
I saw you 20 MINUTES AGO. You need to stop this.
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
we found you outside the hotel room sleeping with a note next to you that said " we made sure you were comfortable, hope your friends come back soon"
Cognac is not meant to be taken in shots. I just wanted you to know the desperation of last night.
Dude are you alive? We drank shit that made a german bartender blow chunks.
Recycling my beer bottles from breakfast counts for earth day, right?
all my mom knows is what I put on facebook. So... I mean... She knows we drink a lot.
mhmm. we know where to go, which places have free bathrooms, how long you can be in one until its sketchy, we have this down to a science. we're like the college sophomore pregaming dream team
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
Im gonna go lick parts of my apartment. Good night and be ever vigilant, you never know when I'm coming to epoxy your hand to you nipple.
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
Randomize
