youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
If I had a quarter for every time I had sex in your bed while you were out of town, I would probably be a lot more willing to buy you new sheets. Hope you're having a nice vacation.
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
you didn't want to pay for the shots so you negotiated with the bartenders. Apparently 1 shot is worth 5 seconds of motor-boating you.
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
My walk of shame turned into having to get his dad to tow my best friends car out of the snowbank in his driveway
The last thing I need is a possessed urethra.
I was just giving a mobile app demo to a client, on my iPhone, when a reminder alert appeared across the page blinking "12pm: go home and give John head". You're an asshole
Hahaha oops.
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
Randomize
