I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
There's a lady carrying her kids toy animals in a crown royal bag. Mom of the year.
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
You did this to me with your delicious pizza and moonshine.
I'll forgive you once we're drunk again by noon.
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
He needs a high five right to the fucking mouth. With a chair. Or an atomic bomb.
I just contemplated drinking cheese dip. And by "contemplated," I mean "attempted and was forcibly stopped from."
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
I'm way too sober and people are way too heterosexual
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
Fun FACT Saturday: Semen is great for my acid reflux
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
Randomize
