ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
oh great, iTunes now thinks im gay.
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
I don't even know why im sitting in this office eating a poptart.
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
His arresting officer when they were busting up the squat party recognized him from the anti-drone protest. He was like Jesus kid, you were sober last time.
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
Never in a million years thought I would have to put jello shot recipe/equation into an excel spreadsheet
Apparently I’m a terrible influence when alcohol is involved
Randomize
