The bride says you won't want any of the single ladies...
Let's let the open bar be the judge of that.
At the end of the night you handed the bartender a piece of paper with the word "VISA" written on it.
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
Dude, its flawless. what could go wrong?
Jail. That could go wrong.
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
Cuz I feel like I ate the whole candy isle at 7/11 last night and chased it with rum
You pretty much did tho
If I had a mugshot, I would totally use it as my main picture on Tinder, just to keep it interesting.
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
I'm usually good at keeping a straight face, but not while singing a ballad to a stranger in a bathroom.
I'm trying to arrange "Flawless" to come on as soon as I get up to leave the room after my thesis defense. Bow down bitches indeed.
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
IM HAMMERED AND JUST HAD CHEESECAKE THAT MADE ME FEEL LIKE NO MAN HAS EVER MADE BE FEEL BEFORE.
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
Randomize
