I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
I woke up hungover and reached for a glass of water only to realize too late that it was vodka sprite with my splooge in it.
the dude from the bar called to tell his mom about me immediately after we finished PLEASE COME GET ME
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
I know. I'm a saint. Saint of sitting on faces.
How was your night?
Good. I made people cry and run home
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
Randomize
