do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex
Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
youre just mad i got the high score on the breathalyzer
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
THIS IS THE EMERGENCY BOOZE SYSTEM. I AM EN ROUTE TO DEWITT WITH A FIFTH OF TEQUILA. THIS IS NOT A TEST
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
Just told some little girl not to judge me as I brushed my teeth in the target bathroom
I can already tell, the amount of fun I'm having right now is not nearly going to compensate for the amount of "let us never speak of this again" I'm gonna have tomorrow
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
Randomize
