so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
Also thongs make me have to fart a lot.
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
I went to the bathroom like 8 times and each time I looked in the mirror and tried saying "I am sober." I burst out laughing when I got to "so-" every time. If you can't convince yourself, you can't convince anyone else. Fuck it, I'm going upstairs and drinking more.
You make your fellow Jews happy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He did not appreciate the "you did reuse the diamond" comment when looking at his new fiance's ring.
Jesus christ it's been two texts and we are already talking about dildos
I put my hydrocodone prescription in my cereal box its like real lucky charms
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
All I've done today is make sangria and wonder what the hell I'm doing with my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He came over and watched the USA game with me, fucked me so good my toe cramped, then made my bed this morning before he left. Thank God for Army rangers
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
FUCK ME I smuggled weed onto a plane by accident
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