do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
I'm in Target and the lady in front of me is buying three Summer's Eve douches, a box of fishsticks and a giant bottle of vodka. The sad thing is I get it.
What I thought it would be sexy pouring melted chocolate down here chest, ended up in second degree burns. Hot food and sex do not mix.
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
Remember when I got my car stuck in my backyard?
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
It's election day and I was just tied up with an American flag scarf
It's a lot harder to work after sex than it is to work drunk... just saying.
I'm pretty sure that cute cop drove me home. Especially since I found his card in my purse.
also, when i showed up he started talking to me and eventually asked me if the girls treated me well. i went on to talk about my sex life. he was talking about his secretaries.
From now on he's gonna have to shave first. It feels like I got eaten out by a chainsaw!
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