just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
Omg just saw this kid I went to elementary school with at the bar and he used to be cool and I was so awkward but now I have boobs so I WIN.
she was drooling, sharted in her sleep, rolled over stuck her hand under the covers pulled it back out, smelled it and moaned and rolled back over. i almost added puke to the disgusting bodily fluid category.
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
He drunk dialed T-Mobile at 3am and talked to them for 45 minutes and got his phone bill lowered from $80 to $60... Best drunk dial ever.
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
Currently separating the burrito I just stuffed in my purse from the weed in my half smoken bowl that was already in it. My what the fuck moment beats yours.
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
he fucked me so hard i could feel my pelvis shifting. like i legit feel more prepared for childirth now
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
As soon as you told us you were an ostrich with a big penis, we began to wonder what you were on and if you wanted to share.
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
Randomize
