yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
TAing a class of 300 froshies and being so hungover I forgot a bra is my way of making dreams come true.
The walk of shame out of a freshman dorm isn't so bad when you're 25, nobody questions you because they think youre gonna bust them for having weed
I go to a class slightly intoxicated and they bring in a baby. What a life.
You know it is an interesting night when the 911 operator calls you
it's my favorite when the couple downstairs are having sex so loud that i feel like I'm part of a threesome
second-hand sex is fun, isn't it?
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
You get home ok?
Uh, you stopped by my house at 4 am and woke me up, so yeah.
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you
Is that a sex thing?
I won the 'drunkest person at a family event' award tonight.
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
He's eating a sriracha ravioli sandwich. How do you think the night is going?
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
Randomize
