Your tits are I can't wait for
So I just almost came on my own face I had to dodge it as it was flying by...that was a first
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
OK WHO CHANGED MY RING TONE TO LADY AND THE TRAMP AND CHANGED EVERY CONTACT IN MY PHONE TO 'SOME GUY I FUCKED'?
Yup, totally tried cooking bacon in the dryer last night.
You fought the bouncer and lost, then challenged a hobo to a 40 chugging contest and lost. Sobriety is a good life choice.
Dude I really need to stop drinking. I chugged a whole bottle of ketchup last night.
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
How does one get out of sexting without being rude? I'm trying to watch Downtown Abbey
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
Randomize
