Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
We just described beer as "big boy apple juice" to his 2 year old.
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
I stole a fireplace last night.
While I was fucking him, he grabbed a taco off his shelf and started eating it. I had taco dripped on me. I have no idea where the taco came from.
Can't a woman sleep on the floor in her own apartment in peace without being judged?
Dude, my ex girlfriend showed up, bought me a tequila shot, made out with me and then disappeared into the night. Then her current girlfriend saw, so she came over and slapped me and then I made out with her too
This was before halftime
I RUINED A LESBIAN RELATIONSHIP BEFORE HALFTIME
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
When you make me feel sane and well-adjusted, it is time to reevaluate your night out habits. Just sayin'.
My vagina still hurts from yesterday. That's the last time I think riding a mop bucket is a good idea. Don't let me do that again
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
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