I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
i woke up to see him pissing on your n64. thats like killing a unicorn. punishable by death for sure.
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
I told my doctor about us having twin chlamydia
I've been on the toilet for an hour. On a six day bender. My ass feels like its leaking vodka
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
MY INSIDES ARE BASICALLY BEING WRUNG BY A CHAINSAW IM NEVER TAKING PLAN B AGAIN
She paid me 300 bucks to spank her and call her Baby Jane. Then we drank half a bottle of sippin whiskey. I'd call it a twelve out of ten.
She's going to jail in a few weeks but she just got a boyfriend. Yet I'm still single as fuck.
THIS IS AN AMERICAN HORROR STORY I CAN'T FIND MY VIBRATOR ANYWHERE WHICH MEANS I LOST IT WHEN I MOVED WHICH MEANS MY POOR VIBRATOR IS OUT THERE IN THE WORLD ALL ALONE RIGHT NOW WHAT AM I GOING TO DO
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
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