Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
I feel like I shouldn't be doing my banking stoned. But I bought a new bowl. Her name is Sharpe. Pronounced Shar-Pay.
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
God loves me. So high, craving Jimmy Johns chips, looked down, unopened bag in front of me. Still doesn't feel real
stop sending me battleship coordinates and get back here so i can suck your dick
Should I go sleeveless of strapless?
Hmmm, it doesn't matter. You're gonna be topless by the end of it.
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
I asked my boyfriend if he wanted a bong for his birthday but he instead asked for corndogs
the cheaper the better
I'm never going out with the ashleys again. it was whoreible. terrifyingly whoreible.
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
I was grinding on my boss last night. So Monday will be fun. That's what's going on in my life right now.
Drugs and unwanted pregnancies are the only things that I'm good at. College comes in at a close third.
Is it still sex if there's no nudity, no orgasms, but the neighbors bang on the wall and ask you to stop? I've honestly forgotten.
Randomize
