question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
You thought cars couldnt see you if you stuck your head in the mail box
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
I saw Winona at my church today. She has boobs, now.
Miracles do happen.
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
Someone played tic tac toe on my abs?
i thought i'd fucked her to death. no lie. she just stopped moving.
It was a taxi full of fist pumps and chanting to "face down, ass up". It was that 1% that makes my job worth it.
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
I'm to sober to make life ruining decisions and alcohol is to expensive at this bar for me to fear that level of drunk happening
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
never let me tell the bartender to cut me off, i basically told on myself
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
Randomize
