dude wtf did we explode in my microwave last night?
idk but i think it had a face
one of the cashiers from Kroger is eating at my kitchen table and nobody knows why.
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
He thought my hair would soak it up. I HAD TO CUT IT OFF.
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
He called me at 4am to ask me to marry him, then threw up into the phone for 10 minutes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're finding a boat, I'm going to sleep with a guy that lives above a bar and has 24 hour access. We are really nailing this adulting thing
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
i'm pretty sure my brother is still drunk from last night. he's telling my parents that humans are at the top of the food chain for a reason and listing off all the exotic animals he would eat
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
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