I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
So I'm banging this nun...
Isn't that how all good stories start? I like it already...
high people should be assigned attendants
My entire life is one complicated drinking game
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
Normally this is when girls give blow jobs. That's how you mentally condition them to put up with PMSing, because they see the shinny blowjob light at the end of the tunnel.
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
I drank, I fought, I made my ancestors proud.
And then someone hit me with a pool cue
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
Welcome to the club of "Sick of cleaning up actual shit." We meet on the 3rd Sunday of each month. Bring your ceremonial viking helmet.
New rock bottom. Woke up at 7 am fully clothed in a bathtub full of water. I hate myself.
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
Randomize
