I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
When you went through airport security you asked if the could check if a baby was in there. That drunk.
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
Drunk me spoon fed everyone baby food last night.
A little boy in a bathroom stall just shouted "mom where's your penis?? Is it inside you?"
the last time I drank tequila I ended up riding your skateboard nude down the street... so yeah, I'll have a few shots.
He made a toga out of my hot pink bed sheets and cracked an egg on his head. Then he proceeded to alphabetize our DVD collection, which was impressive because I'm 99% sure he couldn't have done that sober.
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
I woke up this morning fully clothed with a dart in my pocket
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
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