I failed the drunk obstacle course of trying to find my bed... consolation prize... a sore ankle and "disappointed' parents.
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
so do you, all the weight can't fall on me. I'll befriend a ball pit owner if you will befriend a drug dealer. teamwork.
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
You were sitting in the middle of the floor spewing vodka at people proclaiming "I a whale". That drunk.
I IMAGINED YOU YELLING SURPRISE WITH JAZZ HANDS. AND I LOVE YOU FOREVER
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
You motherfucker. I just had an MRI with a penny under my boob.
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
He was peeing on the back wall of a building. He would have been okay if the building hadn't been a police station.
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
Are you drunk already?
Not already - at LAST.
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
Randomize
