Sometimes I wonder if my friend studies mystic Christian theology because he's afraid to come out of the closet. Evidently, it's okay to talk about God coming inside you, but not to say the same about dudes.
did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers.
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
Putting all my energy Into finding a polite way to ask my mailman to fuck me in his car.
My apartment smells like a lavender field inside of a giant bong.
I just sugar scrubbed my vagina. If I don't get laid tonight, me and the universe are gonna have some problems.
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
Randomize
