Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
I'm concerned you might be passed out on a random rooftop right now. Not concerned enough to do anything about it. Hope you're alive. Goodnight.
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
REALLY should have cleaned under my bed before I had my parents come help me pack...things my parents just found: several condoms and a bottle of lube. My mom when she found a condom: "ooo ribbed. Laura's a lucky girl"
Where was Alyssa when you were sniffing the bouncer?
Passed out on some guy who looked like someone from Duck Dynasty.
Gonna be hard to top last New Year's Eve when the guy I blew came at midnight
I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
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