He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
I think he just gave me the 'I used to fuck your sister' discount
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
I never thought that taking apart multiple age 5 and under puzzles would be part of my house party clean up process.
Yeah, sorry about that. I just couldn't stop.
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
She's currently upstairs fucking her boyfriend while I am downstairs making them a sex playlist watching her boyfriend's Weiner dog and large Boxer try and mount each other. Marvin Gaye is playing. This is the ultimate third wheel fail.
Apparently this is my life now. Fucking men in their 30s with small dogs.
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
I'm gonna have to get a lube sherpa.
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
there is such a gross feeling of satisfaction when the married guy i used to hook up with likes my facebook status.
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
Randomize