Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
We should be flying into LAX instead so when we land I can turn to the right and see the Hollywood sign
You can't even see the fuckin Hollywood sign from LAX. guess she never got the memo
i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im sitting in the back of my pickup eating an artichoke. please come find me, im scared.
that was a mass text, wasnt it?
all nice guys are gay and all hot ones are assholes
You're fat. Stop making excuses
IM A DRUNK BIRTHDAY CLEOPATRA MESS. CELEBRATE THAT BITCH
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
Stop banging my friends. This is getting weird.
Stop being friends with hot 18 year old girls.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im going in through the window and borrowing her dog. Dont worry ive done this before. we have an agreement.
i've been hiding in the laundry chute for like thirty minutes from her. not my manliest moment. but dude this is awesome
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
how do you make "fuck me in the break room" sound casual?
They walked into the house to see me in my neon pink knee high socks trying to pull you out of the cat carrier by your legs...
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
Randomize