Rescue me. My white trash great uncle just pulled out his belly at the restaurant to show us how big this woman's tit was
If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
she looked me in the eyes and called me a poet because i was singing lady gaga, then she fell over...
he asked me if i had ever jacked off high and then referred to it as a "man-to-man question"
What's the point of being healthy if people still don't want to fuck you?
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
Only I could get hit on by homophobic straight guys in a drag bar.
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
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