how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
He kept insisting that I was going to have an orgasm but it just felt like he was rubbing sand paper on my vagina
lets just say that i have already today: gotten drunk, got in a fight, got stranded an hour away from home, found a ride, sobered up, and slept. woken back up, and here i am. its been a long day. Day drinking is bad for friendships.
Just used "I used to work as an inflatable toy operator" as a pick up line. Freshman frenzy is great...
So my OCD kicked in and I cleaned his kitchen. His roommates were so grateful, they tried to pay me in weed.
YOU ACCEPTED, RIGHT?
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
I'm the man of the house if we're referring to livers.
I only have one kid whom I wish to hit in the face with an active jackhammer. How's work?
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
Randomize
