And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
my mom just texted me to let me know that Hooters is hiring
i wish my mom had big dreams like that for me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
I don't know ur idea of a good first date but I'm pretty sure it shouldn't include him holding my hair while I puke in the street
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
Do you have any idea how horrifying it is to hear your sister and her husband fucking then immediately go down stairs only to hear your parents fucking....... I wish I was Hellen Keller right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
New drink: empty coke can vodka water maple syrup. Get on my level
Next time I feel awkward in a situation I'm going to just yell "free bird!!!!" Like some redneck at lynyrd skynyrd show
I have like three friends I don't have sex with, what did you expect
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
Last night I ate a candle out of a strippers ass.... I guess it was an okay night.
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