Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
Was that not clear on Friday when I nearly deapthroated two ice cubes?
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
Come on. I'll make you hot pockets. Literally and sexually.
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO KEEP YOUR SECRETS IF YOU KEEP ON TELLING ME THEM.
When's the best time to point out that all of my orgasms this year have been self-administered? Valentine's day?
NO FUCKBOY SHALL PASS OPERATION #BITCHMODE HAS SUCCEEDED
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
Apparently I told him the people made me order taco bell I didn't even want it. And then proceeded to turn off all the lights and sit at the kitchen table in the dark and told him not to look at me.
Randomize
