I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
We played "race the Jimmy John's driver". Order, then see if we can finish sex before the food arrives.
some guy i've known for a week sent me nudes saying "you're welcome" i need an award for this birthday
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
Yeah, he has a kid now! Shit... You know you're all grown up when the people you used to have threesomes with become parents
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
i'm about to be the still-drunkest person on the ellipticals
Look, sometimes you have to snapchat a topless photo of yourself in the middle of class just to prove you can. I can and I did. End of argument.
I basically have the attention span of a ferret on meth when it comes to men
So apparently it wasn't anything really bad, it's hemorrhoids. Which is the medical word for butthurt. I actually have ass ointment.
Someone just asked me why I drink so much. Im gonna slap a bitch
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
Randomize
