i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
Blackberries need to come with a feature that disables texting to certain numbers after 2am based on content. liek disabling texting to 'dad' containng the words 'lets try to find more blow.'
But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
I wore a firefighters hat and drank beer all night. They had to drive me home after breaking the beer pong table, they told me I was welcome back tonight though...
Because you work where i will be drunk tonight I'm asking you. Is a shirt required on Halloween?
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
We got hammered last night and I woke up this morning with texts from 'iron maiden chick.' wtf?
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
You know you've made it in life when the people in the next stall are cheering on your orgasm
Why r u in my phone under "the last survivor"?
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
So...I know we have a conversation later this week. But one of the key things I want to know is if I can specify having my body mummified and buried in Egypt (or at least nearby the Luxor in Vegas). How much money do you think that would cost? Do I need to increase my life insurance policy?
Randomize
