I wish I could punch you in the face.
Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
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I'm at the grocery store buying monistat and corn nuts. thank god for self check out.
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
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Last night in my drunkenness I bought hurricane supplies which included a jug of wine and a bouquet of flowers. Apparently I'm going to woo Irene.
Yeah but then he looked at me bleeding on the floor, said oh i guess you need to go to the hospital now, and left
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
She slapped a big dramatic bandage on my arm and people started buying me drinks...I plan on wearing a full body cast tomorrow night.
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