1. Call me if you need ANYTHING. 2. If you get tag teamed, I want details.
so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it
only you. it could only happen to you.
His drunken night ended with a "car accident" which really meant he was stuck in a toy car and pushed down the steps.
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
THAT WAS PROBABLY MY ONE CHANCE TO SLEEP WITH A MAN NAMED BORIS AND YOU RUINED IT.
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
literally just tried sending to someone a video of me jerkin but my phone was connected to Apple TV and it literally just played on the tv in a full room and I'm actually about to shit myself
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
My whole life is a joke
Yeah. I’m starting to see why you drink so much.
He expects a blow job at the movies but won’t pay for popcorn? Does he know it’s not 2017 anymore
Randomize
