you know you should just kill yourself when you are helping your 16 year-old sister get ready for a date and you're going out to dinner with you parents..
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
I'm drinking red wine & feeding anchovies to the dog. I'm really not picky about what kinda of company I'm in.
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
Can we just focus for a minute on the fact that I HAD MY FIRST LESBIAN ENCOUNTER.
Right. How rude of me to inform you that you're going to be an aunt.
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
It's accurate though. I am legitimately passionate about pickles. I crave pickles the same way I crave sex. It is a deep rooted animalistic need
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
I grabbed the pretzel bag with my toes last night. I think that day of yoga had paid off.
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
Randomize
