I JUST WOKE UP ON A TRAIN
I SHUDNT B ON A TRAIN
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
God, you're like boner-b-gone
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
He cut you off when you said Paula Dean was in your soul...He kicked you out when "Paula" started eating random peoples food
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
One of my preschool students told me today that it's not pollution that makes the water in lakes unclean. It's the hobos. I was absolutely speechless. And just so proud.
she's just sitting here eating cilantro out of my herb garden and watching some show about ducks on tv and laughing, what the fuck did you give her?
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
Was my shirt on fire at any point last night? Because I'm fairly sure my shirt was on fire.
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
I said I hate kids.This dude said he will sell his children to go on a date with me.
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