you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
Jake died.
WTF????????? That's how you tell me????
Oops typo. Jake cried.
and my herpes radar will keep us safe
After I tried for five minutes to hang my beer from the coat hanger in the bathroom , I have realized I am drunk
You go to school with some of the ugliest girls I've ever seen... How are you not getting laid?
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
Itd be like fucking a waterbed thats been locked in a barn for two years.
Where in the FUCK do you get your analogies
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
i mean, i offered you kinky, jungle themed sex. i don't know what else you want from me
I told him he could fuck me once he could grow a beard. Never expected seeing him ten years later with a goatee and a great memory...
I have seriously seen way too may DIY cut off jean booty shorts and half shirts on fat girls this summer. Fuck you Pinterest.
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
That's so awful of me. Instead of comforting her I masturbated in front of my ex-boyfriend.
Randomize
