He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
so i made out with some dude last night at the bar. and some girl just stood there and watched. i felt bad so i made out with her too. She looked like she felt left out.
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them
So doing the math I dated almost 2 of me in penises. Like, if I you layed them out lengthwise it would be 2 times my height.
The only thing that got me through this hellish day was imagining a large Swedish penis inside of me.
What did your vagina DO during the nhl lockout?!
Americans.
I just found a half a joint in my bed. . .don't know if this qualifies as a proud moment or a cry for help
No one likes wet exercise unless it's vigorous sex in the shower
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
What better than a girl who loves jager, sexts like a champ and is down for t-bell at any hours of the night? oh wait, NOTHING.
Like how do you live your life and have never made a grilled cheese? The audacity of some people
Randomize
