life is all about the fine print - all i wanted was a fucking pony.
i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
And then he told me he was too tired for me to suck his dick. Physically and mentally too tired for me to suck his dick. What the fuck?
I woke up and he used my makeup to write "hope you don't get pregnant" on my mirror before he left
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
Can we make love to the Space Jam soundtrack?
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
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