Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
Just 30 Funny Tumblr Posts About Starbucks
I took us ten minutes to realize the shower sex going upstairs was the reason the kitchen ceiling was flooding.
Your wedding's just one more day in my life I can't wear sweat pants.
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
18 People Are Kind Of A**holes But Also Completely Hilarious
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
I got with a bridesmaid and a server as well as put an $80 tab in rum and coke under the name Emerson Iglesias. Are you sure it wasn't my wedding?
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
Well, he didn't buy me a birthday present but he sure did give me chlamydia so there's that.
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
ICE CREAM AND CAKE BITCHESSSSSS