Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
We should try that some time.
Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
im flying all the way to minnesota to see him for four days... cutest-best-friend-reunion or most-epic-booty-call-ever?
who says it cant be both...
I just realized last night I drunk-bought a flight to Florida for this weekend...kinda torn between the price and the potential of awesomeness
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
She woke up laying on my kitchen floor, ketchup bottle as her pillow, in front of my fridge.
Uh, do you remember who's thong is in my tree?
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
if I see a bottle of vodka right now I'll probably throw up gum I swallowed when I was a kid
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.