We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
We just saw a waitress walk by with a tray of bacardi and whipped cream.
Whoever ordered that deserves a pat on the back and the "classiest customer" award
so i was dancing to the glee soundtrack with highheels. i tripped. and the dildo fell on my face. i dont know what happened.
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
They get 5 minutes to wear their speedos at the wedding
Oh my god I'll have to be really drunk for that
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
I just ran into my psychology professor at Planned Parenthood she asked why I was there and I asked why she was there and it turns out we both had a scare.#bonding because of abortion.
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