Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore.
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
Just coerced a Santa to buy me a handle. Tis the season.
I had to write an apology letter to security guards in the hotel so I didnt get kicked out
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
you fail at everything in life besides blacking out
I don't need to know how horny your mother is, hun.
I'm eating a subway sandwich in the bathtub because I don't want to move. God bless boys from Brooklyn
Dude, he wouldn't have sex with me during halftime cause we were rooting for different teams and that would be "bad juju", I had to settle for 69.
I knew deleting his texts was a bad idea and I was right. I just used the last time we talked to help me figure out when I had my last period
Randomize
