tell your sister to shave her snatch
you really are a gigantic fucking slut.
sidenote: just remembered sarcasm does not translate through text
it's probably a bad thing that i wasn't even offended, huh?
"auto-tuned camel" is how i'd describe the noises she made
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
I'm pretty sure I just overheard my boss call his sperm precious metal...
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
Sorry for feeding you peanuts last night while you were sleeping, you looked hungry.
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've never seen a homeless man jog to get off the bus and then run to his panhandling spot because he's "late for work," but you see something new every day.
The bar has bullet holes in the ceiling, and the country singer had been playing drunken weezer covers. A man just bought me a beer on the grounds that I 'have his back' in a fist fight with a stranger texan. And, yes, the bartender is wearing a sherif's badge
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
I'm gonna go to bars and pick up women hopped up on democracy.
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
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