We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
I think misery doesn't even think of me as company anymore. I'm an unofficial roommate.
Everyone agrees they like your mother better drunk
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
Trying not to ruin Mother's Day with the enormous hickey on my neck. Nice.
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
After this weekend my vagina will follow his penis anywhere. It’s like the pied piper, but with penis
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