That chick was all over your bacon last night, grinding on you, I thought you were going to bang her in the club
Dude it was a lap dance
sorry i'm running a bit late. had to shave my brittney...was looking more like rapunzel. clearly i've been having a drought.
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
I hijacked a bellboy cart and rolled into the party dancing on it
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
You'll have to pretend I'm texting you with buddychecks.
Like the Jimeny Cricket of cockblocks.
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
How do I cancel buying spotify premium for two homeless people?
I think I just got booty called by someone I've never slept with or even really had a conversation with before.
Why is the microwave staring at me?!
Randomize
