16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
We just saw a waitress walk by with a tray of bacardi and whipped cream.
Whoever ordered that deserves a pat on the back and the "classiest customer" award
I have a voicemail from Mike at 1am. He starts to say something, but then throws up instead.
I just found glitter on my vibrator... whatever we're doing has to stop
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
I think he just gave me the 'I used to sleep with your sister' discount
i drank out of my shoe...were you seriously expecting me to be the voice of reason?
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
future reference: when you get a text that says "WARNING: EXPLICIT PHOTOS BEING DELIVERED. VIEWERS DISCRETION IS ADVISED." you always open the attached picture.
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
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