you used to get mad at me for mentioning 'unprotected sex' and happenings in my bed
well yeah, but then i realized the wisdom of your ways.
you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
I've come to accept that no matter where I step in our apartment, your underwear will be there.
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
Eight drinks in. Subject is fondling chips before eating them. Intoxicated texting has expanded from best friend to random guy I met in FBLA.
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
Periods are much less exciting when you're not sexually active.
Randomize
