Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
How the fuck did I get small bruises all over my body?
Well you were laying on the couch naked after the girls left, staring into space, and I went over to the pool table and threw every ball as hard as I could at you from point blank range . You didn't flinch, blink, or scream for any of them. next time maybe you won't fuck my girl while I'm taking a shit
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
In the hospital waiting to be tested for the first uti of the school year....I'm BACK BTICHES.
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
I just had some guy offer to eat me out on my lunch break... I think single life is getting better everyday
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
I will be going to walgreens soon.. nothing says trainwreck like pickin up a scrip for xanax at 2am drunk..
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
You do realize last night you asked me if shampoo had an expiration date then cried for 15 mins when I told you it did
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
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